The Crazy Business

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I’ve had a rough couple of days this week. The ups and downs of bipolar disorder can make it difficult to keep a schedule and manage the tasks needed to run a business. My energy is extremely limited so I have to be extra selective about what I choose to use it on. Some days just showering and getting dressed can leave me exhausted for hours afterwards. On these days my beautifully creative mind becomes my worst enemy. It craftily bullies me with the most hurtful accusations. Here’s a small sample:

You’re so lazy and pathetic, no wonder you don't accomplish anything. If you had more discipline you could really do something with your life. But you never will because you’re weak. Everyone else is keeping their shit together except for you! You disgust me…

I’ll mute the inner dialogue now that you have an accurate picture. 

I let my mind say things to me that I would never say to anyone else. (I would hesitate to say them to my worst enemy!) If anyone attacked my loved ones with such hateful words I’d rush to their defense, ready to bloody a nose. But when the threats are self inflicted I seem to welcome them as if I deserve punishment. Sharing all of this with you, kind reader, is one way I fight back. Making the hateful words inside my head visible allows me to see them for the lies they truly are.

Whilst I’ve read many helpful articles about creative entrepreneurship it wasn’t until recently that I discovered any that addressed the unique challenges of running a business when you have a chronic physical or mental illness. Sometimes more helpful than the advice offered is just knowing that you’re not alone in the struggle. Here are some of my favorite reads: 

Anything by Esmé Wang! She’s a profound writer and articulate advocate living with schizoaffective disorder and late-stage Lyme disease. You can find her blog HERE 

More awesomeness - 

The series Off We Go: Entrepreneurs & Mental Illness

The Psychological Price of Entrepreneurship

Making Your Own Way Down the Bumpy Road Less Traveled

Mental Illness & Entrepreneurship – Owning Nonstandard Narratives

The Great Discontent: Ruthie Lindsey 

I’ve also created THIS Pinterest board for all around awesome creative entrepreneur advice.

Stay tuned: In future posts I aim to share some of my own tips and techniques for running a business when there’s a chronic illness tagging along. Have your own tales and tips? Share below!